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Category Archives: Nurturing family relationships

The Family Tree

25 Wednesday Nov 2015

Posted by bonksearing in Family History/Genealogy, From the Heart (About Heritage and Gratitude), In the Family Room, Nurturing family relationships

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Almost a year in the making, my dream Family Tree is finally up on the wall!  I’ve never fancied myself any kind of decorator, but even I knew I needed a serious overhaul when I traded the old desk with a high back for this simpler version, exposing more of the ugly wall.  One of my passions, as you know, is family history research which I accomplish while facing this very wall for untold hours.  I was initially inspired by trendy floor-to-ceiling stenciled tree silouettes, but I didn’t want it to be too generic.  If I was going to the trouble of putting it up, I needed it to be personally meaningful and help my family become more acquainted with our ancestors.  As I brainstormed (for literally months) my idea eventually morphed into something totally different from the original idea.  I stretched canvases, gessoed, painted, attached photo prints, and framed all by hand and a long process of trial and error.

BEFORE: This is the space designated for the family tree.
BEFORE: This is the space designated for the family tree.
All graphed out in an attempt to avoid any surprises in the fit
All graphed out in an attempt to avoid any surprises in the fit
Here's the preliminary background for the canvas and newly painted wall
Here’s the preliminary background for the canvas and newly painted wall
One of about a hundred trees I photographed in research for THE tree. This one grows around the corner from my house. I'm still tempted to use it on a future project.
One of about a hundred trees I photographed in research for THE tree. This one grows around the corner from my house. I’m still tempted to use it on a future project.
I ultimately decided on this tree to use as my pattern. I found it in Northampton, Massachusetts.
I ultimately decided on this tree to use as my pattern. I found it in Northampton, Massachusetts.

The most difficult part of this project was figuring out how to attach the photos in a way that they could be rearranged.  I spent most of forever collecting family photographs, resizing, and adjusting the colors to semi-uniform tones.  Then I experimented with printing them on canvas I had hand gessoed and cut to fit my printer. (I could have spent the money to have them printed professionally, but there’s apparently something in my DNA that prevents me from doing things the easy way.  If I CAN do something myself, I can’t bring myself to NOT do it.) I tried a couple of different methods before I settled on using mod-podge to secure the little canvas prints, along with name labels, to balsa wood I had painted black.  To the back of each little picture print I fastened a metal washer, using round ceramic magnets behind the canvas to make them repositionable in the hopes that more photos will become available to me in the future.

The joy is in the journey, and in this case, it also resulted in a keepsake I’m proud to display.

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Here’s how my computer corner looks now. I am so delighted with how it turned out. In one short year (HA!) the ugliest wall in the house has turned into a sentimental focal point.

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Refreshing our Family’s Focus

18 Monday Aug 2014

Posted by bonksearing in Faith, Nurturing family relationships

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

family discussion, goals, imagination, perspective, potential

Whenever the “generation gap” (can I still use that term?) wedges itself between members of my family I need to remind myself how to refresh our focus on what’s important to all of us together in the long run.  Depending on our age and interests, we tend to have varying goals and pastimes, sometimes at extreme odds with each other, but we are still a family and the ultimate goal is the same for us all.  Awhile back I was inspired to initiate a discussion with my family that turned out to be enlightening and resulted in a state of awesome, silent, deep reflection that, as a parent, you hope will counterbalance the multitude of frivolous default activities in your children’s future.

As nearly as I can recall, here’s how it went:

I began by asking my family to tell me what they would wish for if there were no obstacles or limitations to what they could have. At the top of their list were things like the latest electronic equipment and toys they might have put on a Christmas wish list.  “That’s it?”  I egged them on, “I mean, really, the sky’s the limit.”

They switched over to their “if I had a million dollars” list. TVs in every room, a house with an expansive library and garage to accommodate the nicest cars and boats; vacations; no school; their own media store. That still wasn’t what I was looking for.  “Come on,” I urged them on, “Really let your imagination loose and tell me what you’d like if there were truly, absolutely no limits to your greatest desires.”

Imaginative, impossible gadgets were added to the list. Then someone asked why we should need any gadget at all. Wishing for maintenance-free vehicles that flew immediately turned to wishes of instantaneous travel without use of any vehicle, and the desire for immediate-access-to-everything-smart phones morphed into all-knowing, all-powerful access through their own minds. Every imaginable superpower flew through the air between us, from breathing underwater to healing powers to a free automatic transfer of intelligence between human minds. They were energized by ideas of the most amazing things they could think of being theirs, all without limitations of money, time, physical or mental abilities.

When everyone’s imagination had been set free of the restraints of reality, when the thrill of unlimited possibilities of not only having, but also becoming free and powerful beings had rejuvenated all of us, We acknowledged that all of these ideas had come from our own hearts and minds.  Then I read them this verse:

But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him. 1 Corinthians 2:9

(italics added)

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What Knobbies, Bobbles, and Obtuse-ish Angles have to do with Keeping Christmas

11 Saturday Jan 2014

Posted by bonksearing in Family History/Genealogy, From the Heart (About Heritage and Gratitude), In Celebration (Traditions and Holidays), In the Family Room, Nurturing Children, Nurturing family relationships

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This past Christmas was like a jigsaw puzzle.  As with a puzzle, there are a multitude of unique and colorful pieces that make up our celebration each year–some darker and others especially light and bright.  When put together in just the right combinations and in the company of friends and family, they accumulate to make a memorable treasure that is more valuable than the sum of the parts.

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This is part of our favorite Christmas Lights Display at Temple Square in Salt Lake City, Utah.

Christmas and puzzles both illustrate to me the saying that there’s more joy in the journey than in the destination. As with every Christmas, a puzzle is most enjoyable before it’s finished–before you have to decide whether to preserve and frame it, or pack it all away in the box again.  This year I struggled to begin the process of packing our Christmas decorations up until next–to concede that it was finished.

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Here’s more of the display at Temple Square.

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Celebrating Christmas Day with all the extended family at the Bowl was a memorable treat.

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The cold is always more bearable with cousins and Christmas lights.

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We rode the Trax train into Salt Lake City to see the Christmas Lights right after Thanksgiving every year. 

This is the first year that my dad wasn’t with us to add to our Christmas memories, so, during the weeks prior to Christmas and up until the New Year, I made a conscious decision to hold fast to some of our favorite traditions and re-establish others in his honor–including a few surrounding the jigsaw puzzle table.

IMG_1845Dad was content with simple things. Finding a unique gift that would surprise and delight him was a challenge. Good Kids–obedient, honest, helpful–that’s what he really wanted,  but maybe for our sake we wanted him to have something under the tree to unwrap, too.

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We watched impatiently as he opened his gifts. He’d slowly turn them over in his hands, shake them gently, and comment how he hated to ruin such lovely wrapping. He’d wonder out loud, teasing our patience and savoring the moment. He would carefully peel the tape from the wrapping paper, folding and smoothing it.

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He was able to see well enough to do crossword puzzles after he couldn’t do jigsaw puzzles anymore. Even then, there came a point where he needed a magnifying glass.

His expressions of gratitude were worth the wait, though I realized as I grew older that his surprise was often feigned.  He pretty much expected a book, a new Sunday shirt, a package of socks.  He would know it when he shook it,  but a jigsaw puzzle was always good for a surprise when the paper came off. He’d run his fingers over the flowers, mountain valleys, meadows, or architecture featured in our selection as he admired its beauty and appraised the difficulty presented by the contrast of colors in it.

Once the gifts were all opened and kids were settled in concentrating on new toys, Dad always set up the card table and, with his car keys, sliced the seal on the puzzle box.  He never had a shortage of help to turn the pieces face up, sort them into colors, or locate the ones with straight edges for him.  I used to love to take a few pieces out of the middle just to experience the elation–the feel and sound (almost a “crunch”)–of finding the perfect fit again. Until Macular Degeneration pretty much claimed his sight a few years ago, Dad always spent quiet hours in the week following Christmas finishing his puzzle.

My husband doesn’t get into them like I do, but I thought my kids might remember Grandpa’s puzzles, and decided to get one this year for old times’ sake.  For me. For them.  For the sake of sitting around the table without apps or earphones or digital distractions, and for completing something that we could work together to accomplish. . . for the sake of conversation.  For Dad.

I didn’t know if my teenagers would even attempt such an old fashioned pastime. But when Santa brought us a puzzle from Eric Dowdle’s collection featuring Chicago in 500 interlocking pieces they were agreeable to spend a few hours on it. I was pleasantly surprised when my son insisted that his sister wait to open the box when he could be there.  We sorted and searched in semi-quiet concentration with occasional bursts of random thoughts, songs, or cooperative conversation.  “Pass me all the pieces with wheels.” or “Anyone see the rest of this fountain?”  Time flew and we finished it in a few hours.  It became a centerpiece for our kitchen table for a day or two and then we broke it down again and boxed it up. It all happened so fast I didn’t even think to get a picture.  I was delighted at the suggestion that we should do another one.

I found another 500 piece Americana styled picture of a dog-walking park in the after Christmas sales.  Two hours after we emptied the box, we were racing to place the final pieces. Like the first, it only played the part of centerpiece for a short while before we craved another.

The New Year was still days away.  The next puzzle had to be more challenging, and I knew just the one to do.  My mom had shown me a puzzle that she intended to give to anyone in the family who thought they were up to it.  I visited her and asked if it had been claimed. She disappeared into Dad’s office and emerged with a 1000 piecer in a painting called  Wherever He Leads Me by the Christian artist Greg Olsen, along with three less challenging ones.  There was no question which we would attempt first.

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This one was unlike the others we had done. No single piece had any recognizable features.  Our original sort only included four categories:  straight edge pieces, “darks”, “lights”, and anything we couldn’t definitively place in the previously mentioned categories.

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The colors were so subtle and similar that we couldn’t be sure of which area of the puzzle any particular piece belonged to. We began to distinguish the subtle variations of color (pale creamy yellows and dark brownish greens) and nuances of the textures. We soon found ourselves naming the various shapes of the pieces we were in need of.  “Anyone see a  light ‘buttered popcorn jelly bean’ yellow one with a diagonal line across the bobble?”  “I’m looking for a darkest reddish brown one with at least three adjacent knobbies, one fat bobble, and an obtus-ish angle.”  “Almost, but it has to be squattier.”  Some were just easier to think of in terms of body parts. “It’s about this shape, but the shoulders are narrower” or “it has one large poky knee and a smallish tilted head.” Sometimes it was almost impossible to tell if we had a true match, even after we had checked the seam from the back.  More than once, I had to remove a piece that had previously passed the test after I had discovered its neighbor.  It was intense.  The kids needed breaks after just so long. I knew it couldn’t stay forever on the kitchen table, so I invested most of two days to complete it.  IMG_1652

In the end, our cooperative effort was rewarded in under three days. This one is going to be framed. After all, the really good memories were never meant to be packed away in a box. I guess I’m justified in wanting to surround myself with Christmas all year long.

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Crocheted Snowflakes & The Festival of Trees

30 Monday Dec 2013

Posted by bonksearing in From the Heart (About Heritage and Gratitude), Gift Ideas, Going Out, In Celebration (Traditions and Holidays), Knit and Crochet, Nurturing family relationships

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

Christmas, crochet, Festival of Trees, fundraiser, magnified snowflake, Primary Children's Hospital, Snowflakes

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For many years I have loved the delicate intricacies of crocheted snowflakes, but felt a little intimidated to attempt to make one myself.  This year I finally summoned the motivation to try it, and I have been amazed and encouraged by my results.  If you are unaccustomed to the small size of #10 crochet cotton and a microscopic (almost) steel hook (I use size 6, most patterns recommend the even smaller 7) it may take a little time to get comfortable with it.  Even if you do a lot of handwork, you may find that they cause your hands to cramp more than usual, but I’ve found that it’s not nearly as difficult as I always thought.  I followed the step by step pattern shown on this video tutorial. . . IMG_1626

. . .and this one–although it was a little more difficult to follow, since I don’t speak Russian.  It was so beautiful, though, that I persisted and was very pleased with my final product.

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I played with a few techniques I learned from the videos, including the “magic circle” and a few different ways to make picots, and have come up with a couple of my own slight variations.  For me, a snowflake is just not a snowflake if it has more or less than six geometric sides.  So I will continue to play with them and come up with original designs based on other crochet techniques and pictures I’ve seen online, including these stunning photos of real snowflakes.

If you’re interested in learning how to graph a design for your own crochet snowflake, click here.  To see a tutorial on how to sugar harden your snowflakes, click here.  If you are like me, and prefer a visual pattern rather than a written one, you may be interested in learning the technique of charting crochet patterns, as seen here.

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My long term goal is to decorate a tree almost entirely in crocheted snowflakes for The Festival of Trees next year in honor of my dad.  The Festival of Trees held in Salt Lake City is unlike any Christmas celebration you’ve ever seen!  There are other tree festivals throughout the world, I suppose, but this has been dubbed the “granddaddy of them all.”  The money raised benefits Primary Children’s Hospital.  My family and I have been indebted to them for helping to work miracles of turning stressful times of worry into peace and hope, with happy, healthy children on more than one occasion.  We have made a tradition of going to the festival annually on the first weekend of December.  We know we’ll find the true spirit of giving and gratitude and a healthy perspective of our blessings.  We always take a pocket full of tissues.  Many of the trees are donated in honor of–and dedicated to the memories of–children who have suffered and struggled at Primary Children’s Hospital.  Others are made in honor of adults who have left us and are missed (like my daddy who lost his battle with Alzheimer’s this year.) We cry–for sorrow for those who have lost their battles, and for the families who are left behind–and for joy for the many children who have come out triumphant and carefree.  We always leave feeling better connected as a family and feeling grateful to be alive.  I’m excited to use my new found talents and resources to contribute to such a worthy cause!  I’ll post on my progress as the year goes by, so be sure to check back for updates!

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Children’s Songs of Christmas

03 Tuesday Dec 2013

Posted by bonksearing in Faith, From the Heart (About Heritage and Gratitude), In Celebration (Traditions and Holidays), Nurturing Children, Nurturing family relationships

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Baby Jesus, children's music, Christmas songs, Christmas traditions, Picture a Christmas, The Nativity, true meaning of Christmas

I love to spend Sundays in December with the Primary children at church. Yesterday I was asked to fill in on the piano while they learned The Nativity Song.  Picture a Christmas is another of our favorites.  The links will take you to a page where you can download a pdf version of the sheet music for piano and an mp3 recording of children singing the songs.  I hope you’ll love these songs, and feel the reverent spirit of Christmas as much as I do!  And when you do, please share it with the children in your life!  Isaiah 54:13 (KJV) ~ And all thy children shall be taught of the LORD; and great shall be the peace of thy children.

Picture a Christmas

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1. Picture a stable in Judea.
Picture a sacred, silent night.
And can you hear
The angels near
And see the star so bright?
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(Chorus)
Picture the little baby Jesus.
Think of his life and words so dear.
Sing praise to him;
Remember him,
As you picture Christmas this year.
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2. Picture the kind and gentle Joseph.
Picture the mother, Mary, fair.
And can you see
So rev’rently
The shepherds kneeling there?
(Repeat Chorus)

Words and music: Patricia Kelsey Graham, b. 1940. (c) 1983 IRI

The Nativity Song

1. This is the season beloved of the year.
Sing a rhyme; Christmastime soon will be here.
Tell the true story of Jesus’ birth,
When, as a baby, he came to the earth.IMG_1596
2. This is the new star, shining so bright,
Lighting the world on that first Christmas night.
This is the angel proclaiming the birth,
Singing “Hosanna!” and “Peace on the earth!”
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3. This is the stable, shelter so bare;
Cattle and oxen first welcomed him there.
This is the manger, sweet hay for a bed,
Waiting for Jesus to cradle his head.
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4. These are the shepherds, humble and mild,
Hast’ning to worship the heavenly child.
These are the wise men who followed the star,
Frankincense, gold, and myrrh brought from afar.
Christmas 2001 Scott and Shannon as Joseph and Mary
5. See the sweet mother, Mary so fair,
Joseph, who guided the donkey with care.
See the dear baby of Bethlehem,
Little Lord Jesus, the Savior of men.IMG_1617
Words: Patricia Kelsey Graham, b. 1940. (c) 1980 IRI. Adapted from the poem “The Nativity Story” by Avon Allen Compton.
Music: Patricia Kelsey Graham, b. 1940.

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Knit Cozy-Hug-Shrug

16 Saturday Nov 2013

Posted by bonksearing in Gift Ideas, Knit and Crochet, Nurturing family relationships

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

cable stitch, knit, knit gift., knit lacing stitch, shrug

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You can see I’ve been on a knitting kick, lately.  Here’s another project I’ve recently finished.  I made it for my niece.  It was a surprise, and I asked her model it with the t-shirt she was wearing at the time.  I’m sure it will be cuter with the right outfit. . . but doesn’t she have a great smile?!  She’s a sweetheart–so appreciative, it makes me really enjoy making things for her!  In the cooler weather that’s coming, there are very few things that make a person feel so scrumptiously warm and comfortable as a Cozy-Hug-Shrug!

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It doesn’t get simpler than this:  it’s just one big rectangular piece, then seamed up on each end to form the sleeves.  I began with 60 stitches in a provisional cast on in the middle of the back.  I made up the random pattern of striped rows as I went along (using only knit, purl, and an occasional lacing row of K2, k2tog, y/o, k1). Approximating from the center back to the shoulder, I switched the direction of the stripes with cables down the sleeves, and ended with about three inches of rib stitching at the elbows.  I picked up the live stitches from the cast on (center back) and mirrored the pattern for the other side.  (I was especially careful to change the direction of the cables.)  I finished it off by seaming up the sleeves and weaving in the ends.  You can’t really see from the pictures, but this is a very soft, gushy, delicious yarn!  (Red Heart Soft) and it really is black.  (I don’t know why it looks so light in the pic.)

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Vintage Knit Owl Pattern ReDressed

10 Sunday Nov 2013

Posted by bonksearing in From the Heart (About Heritage and Gratitude), Gift Ideas, In Celebration (Traditions and Holidays), In the kids' Room, Knit and Crochet, Nurturing Children, Nurturing family relationships, On a Shoestring

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

birthday cake, button eyes, first birthday, handmade gift, knit dress, owls, vintage knit pattern

Here’s my inspiration.  My grandma made this little sweater vest many years ago, now modeled by the daughter of my cousin who wore it long ago.  I’m somewhat new to making cables, but I thought it would be fairly simple to “pick off the pattern” as there are no sleeves or decrease rows for the neckline.

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My first attempt was interesting–harder than I thought to actually write down the pattern.  I could easily see what I needed to do, but couldn’t quite figure out how to document each stitch for others to follow.

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I need to study up on the notations for cable stitches before I can finish this, but that’s my goal.  For now, I’ll describe the process in general, with plans to finish the stitch-by-stitch pattern shortly.  I used two of the smaller sized skeins of worsted weight yarn and size 7 needles.  (Next time I’ll use size 8 and a single color yarn.)

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I thought the gray and white would be cute for the “woodsy” pattern.  It makes it a little harder to make out the form of the owls, still, you can sort of see them.  I decided to make the vest a little longer to be a “dress” for my year old niece’s birthday.  With the colorful buttons I chose for the eyes, I think it will be cute with long sleeves and tights of any bright color, white, black, or gray.

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I cast on 40 stitches, then had to determine whether to knit from the top down, or up from the bottom.  I decided to start with 8 rows of ribbing first, then continued knitting in the stockinette stitch for about 10 inches–going UP.  The owl pattern required about 18 rows, with four stitches of the garter stitch on each side for the sleeves.  I finished with seven rows across the top (shoulders and neckline).

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I cut the yarn off in a long tail (36 inches should be more than plenty, but I wouldn’t want to skimp) and attached one shoulder with the Kitchener stitch, for 10 stitches, bound off 20 stitches for the neckline using the crochet bind off (love it!), then finished off with the Kitchener stitch on the last 10 stitches of the other shoulder.  (Check verypink.com for tutorials on all of these processes.)

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For the back, make the ribbing and stockinette stitch up to the sleeve opening, then the garter stitch along the 18 rows that were the owl pattern on the front, and seven more across the top to form the edge that will be the sleeve openings and neckline/shoulders. The seam down the sides was “like cake” using this tutorial from (you guessed it) verypink.com.

Here it is on my live “yearling” model at her birthday party.

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And here’s the Happy (Hungry!) Birthday Girl stripped down for birthday cake.  Can’t eat cake like this with a new dress on.IMG_1522

Coming soon: an actual pattern for the original vest.  And–surprise!  They aren’t really owls.
UPDATE: PATTERN POSTED HERE. HAPPY KNITTING!

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Sometimes a Girl Just Needs to Bake Cookies

04 Monday Nov 2013

Posted by bonksearing in In Celebration (Traditions and Holidays), In the Kitchen, Nurturing family relationships, Recipes

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

frosting cookies, improvised decorating bag, sugar cookies, Thanksgiving cookies, turkey cookies

After working together as a family to catch up on a little house- and yard-work Saturday, we had our separate errands and projects to do for a few hours.  My daughter decided on a little “baking therapy.” Sometimes a girl just needs to bake cookies.  I can relate to the need to lose yourself in the creative service of making something delicious to share.  But it’s been a long time since I had patience to do roll-out cookies.  She searched the internet and found this recipe from Wilton.  The rest of us left while she mixed and baked, but when I saw how cute her first little turkeys turned out, I just had to document the rest of the process.  With just a cup for a cookie cutter, two containers of frosting, food color paste, candy corns and sprinkles she designed these adorable turkeys.  She even improvised the decorating bag by cutting a tiny hole in a zip plastic bag!  I’ll let the pictures tell the rest of the story.

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Priorities, Anyone?

01 Friday Nov 2013

Posted by bonksearing in From the Heart (About Heritage and Gratitude), Going Out, Nurturing Children, Nurturing family relationships

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Family Relationships, priorities, quality time, teenagers, tennis

Time is life. We all have the same number of seconds per day, so why is it that I never seem to have enough of it to do all the things I have in mind?  I’ve never understood boredom.  There are enough projects in my head to fill decades of free time.  Still, I’ve mis-spent plenty of time, and value mindless relaxation, too.  But the quest for “busy”-ness can overcome me like an illness.  I haven’t posted much, lately, because I’ve neglected a few of my most important priorities in the name of productivity. (Matt. 6:21  “For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”)

Aligning my activities with the priorities I consciously acknowledge needs continual tweaking. That’s why, when my high school freshman son decided he wanted to try out for the tennis team, I found myself in this beautiful setting.

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As you may suspect, I’m an unlikely sight at the tennis court.  I’m just elated when I make contact with the ball, no matter where it goes.  His dad would have been a better partner, as he lettered in tennis in high school, but he wasn’t available for the afternoon.

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Fortunately our son is athletic and fit (unlike his mom.) He’s also a really good kid.  After all, teenagers and their moms don’t always see eye to eye, and we’re no exception, but he never seemed to mind being seen with his frumpy old mom.  We had the court to ourselves and had wonderful candid conversation while we ran after the ball.  He even admitted he was having a great time.  I guess he really was, because we went out again every afternoon all week while the weather was nice.

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We each noticed some improvement.  I started connecting on my backhand.  His serve improved and he started to get comfortable switching hands.  The best thing was the self-depreciating comic relief.  Sharing the same air in the family room, each doing our own thing, just isn’t synonymous with quality time.  If I had chosen to be “productive” I might have missed out on the treasured opportunity to relax and catch up on my relationship with my son in this beautiful setting!

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Family History Fair and the Legacy of John Ellis, Mormon Pioneer

25 Friday Oct 2013

Posted by bonksearing in Faith, Family History/Genealogy, From the Heart (About Heritage and Gratitude), Nurturing Children, Nurturing family relationships

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Book of Mormon, Brigham Young, faith, family history, Familysearch, John Ellis, Joseph Smith, Mormon pioneer, religious persecution, Scarborough Canada, succession of the presidency, Utah settlement

For the past couple of months I’ve served on the committee for a Family History Fair our church hosted for the community last weekend. There were three planned events.

Friday night we had an “Indexing Party” where folks could bring their own laptop computer and get help logging in to Familysearch.com and getting started on indexing photographed records into a searchable database.

Saturday we had three hours of workshops, presenting several class choices each hour, followed by a catered lunch. Classes covered everything from computer resources and access to scrapbooking and blogging your personal history. There were classes on photographs, both ancestry and descendency on the family tree (roots and branches), international research tips and technology. There were classes presented in English and Spanish. We had a few hundred people, I’m guessing, and everyone I talked to said it was really helpful and inspiring.

Sunday topped the weekend off with a fireside with the temple president and his wife speaking to families about eternal families and other blessings of temple worship.

I wasn’t able to attend any of the Friday or Saturday classes, because my involvement was in the children’s program. We provided nursery for children from 18 months to 3 years, and a rotating schedule of classes for children ages 4 to 11. There were craft projects, games, activities, songs, and stories of inspiring historical figures.
Of course, the children’s program was geared to their level of understanding and interest, but I am so glad I was able to share a little of my passion for family history with them.

During the course of our plans, I delved a little into some of the stories and life histories I have in my possession and learned (or re-learned) a few things about one of my ancestors, John Ellis. This is the grandson of the elusive one I wrote about in a past post.  He chose the more difficult path to leave his home and family, to leave his parents’ tradition in favor of following his heart on the subject of religion.  Whatever you may think of his choice, it’s undeniable that he left a legacy of unyielding faith and determination to follow the man he believed to be a modern prophet of God.  He went to his grave firm in the faith and confident that he had lived his life in such a way that he was prepared to meet his maker unashamed.

John Ellis was born in 1814 in Scarborough, Ontario, Canada; the oldest of twelve children of John Ellis and Hannah Stoner.  I love his story, as expressed in his own words beginning with what he considered the pivotal event in his life when he was twenty-two years old:

“The true Church of Jesus Christ has been restored to the earth by a Prophet of God, and we are here to teach you the true principles, as were taught by Jesus Christ, when He was upon the earth! May we come in?” I heard these words and saw the two missionaries at our door in Scarboro, Ontario, Canada. But then I heard my father turn them away. I looked at my mother but she, too, was unresponsive to those words. I couldn’t believe it! Didn’t they have a strange burning within their hearts upon hearing those powerful words, as I had? . . . I was still curious about why I had that “burning feeling” when I heard their words of greeting, so I attended their meetings and I investigated their claims thoroughly by reading their Book of Mormon before I asked for baptism in November, 1836. I had not told my parents . . . I knew their strong “anti” feelings toward the missionaries, and their activities in our community.
So my secret baptism had been a joyous time for me to be able to declare my true feelings to my Father in Heaven and to commit myself, for the rest of my life, to living His laws and commandments. But it was a sad time, when my family found I had gone against their wishes, and had actually given up their professed religion, to join another. Their bitter feelings made me realize that I could no longer be happy in their home, so on that winter night in 1837 I bade good night to my family . . . I knew that I would never see any of them again in this life. I skated around Lake Erie and into the United States, where I eventually made my way to Far West, Missouri, where the Saints were advised a temple would be built. (Note:  this was a journey of 1089 miles)

The missionaries had promised that we “would find friends and loved ones” if we had to leave our homes, to follow the dictates of our hearts, so I was most happy to join with other families from the Scarboro area, who were living in Far West when I arrived there.

1870 John Ellis and Harriett Hales

The Hales Family, Stephen and Mary Ann, were very good to me and took me into their home. It was there, at Far West, that I first saw the “Mormon-hating mobbers” gathered to drive us from our homes. Joseph Smith and five companions were imprisoned in Liberty Jail for six months. Much of the time they were in chains, food not fit to eat, and even poison was given them in food, making them very sick, and only through the blessings of the Lord, they were preserved, and at last freed. With all three of the Presidency in prison, the burden of removing the Saints from Missouri was placed upon Brigham Young. He showed his leadership ability in arranging and devising plans for every soul to be helped in their move to Illinois. I was able to help the Hales in their move and then returned, time after time, to take other Brothers and Sisters to Quincy, Illinois.
We were received there with a friendly welcome and the residents voiced their disapproval of the treatment we had received from Missouri mobs. The Hales purchased a farm, and many other Saints chose to remain in Quincy. The Prophet had purchased land for $14,000, on long-term notes, of a place called Commerce. It was about 50 miles up the River from Quincy, and an excellent site for a city. The Mississippi River made a half-circle around the place, giving three fronts on the River. After draining the swamps, and much hard work, it became “Nauvoo, the Beautiful.”

At Quincy, on 31 October, 1839, I was married to the lovely Harriet Hales. I guess I fell in love with her upon first sight. . . It was a double wedding, as her brother Charles Henry and Julia Lockwood were married that day, too.

Our first baby, Mary Ann was born there on 10 December 1840.
Then the trouble began again. . . So we moved to Nauvoo, where our second child, Hannah Isabella, was born 31 December, 1843.
At Nauvoo, I became a body guard for the Prophet Joseph, and also a member of the Nauvoo Legion. The Prophet vowed that “we would never be driven from our farms and homes again.” He organized the Nauvoo Legion, an army of men, who were trained to protect our city, our families and homes, and the farmers of the surrounding countryside, which we were called to do many times. I served as Quartermaster in the Legion. When Joseph was to be arrested, for the so-called attempted murder of Missouri Governor Boggs, he went into hiding, and I helped with his seclusion, but soon he gave himself up and proved he was not guilty of the attempt. He urged the people to work longer and harder to finish the Temple, as he predicted his own fate when he said in Conference, “I shall not be sacrificed until my time comes, then I shall be offered freely. The Kingdom of God was set upon the earth from the days of Adam to the present time. They will never have the power to kill me until my work is done.” Nauvoo had risen from a swamp and wilderness in 1839 to a commonwealth of twenty thousand Saints in 1844. In June, 1844, threats were made to exterminate the Saints and utterly destroy the city, by Missouri and Illinois mobs. The city was placed under martial law and the Legion called out to serve in self defense.

As the Prophet stood before us in the uniform of a commanding General, he said, “It is thought by some that our enemies would be satisfied by my destruction, but these men are moved upon by the adversary of all righteousness, and he is out to destroy every man, woman, and child who believes the doctrine that God gave me to teach to this generation.” On 22 June, Joseph and Hyrum decided to save the people of Nauvoo from the fate of being driven from their homes again. They had been told that the officials wanted only Joseph, but Hyrum refused to leave his side, knowing he also would be killed. Both planned to leave the city to go to the West and seek a place of refuge for them all, at a later date. However, his wife Emma sent a letter to Joseph saying the people thought him a coward in deserting his flock for the wolves to devour again. He returned, saying, “If my life is of no value to my friends, it is of none to myself. . . I go like a lamb to the slaughter.” They were taken to Carthage jail to stand trial, but were murdered on 27 Jun, 1844. We had lost our beloved Prophet!


A meeting was called to determine who was to lead the Church, on 8 August, 1844. Sidney Rigdon gave his revelation as to the Lord appointing him “guardian of the Church”; then in the afternoon Brigham Young spoke, telling us of the power given the Twelve Apostles, and all the Keys of the Kingdom: they stood next to Joseph Smith. We saw his whole being changed as the mantle of Joseph fell upon him, and his stature grew to the form of Joseph, and his voice became that of Joseph’s, even to the slight whistle from a broken tooth that distinguished his speech from any other. No one could doubt his power, through this transformation before our very eyes! We were absolutely convinced that Brigham Young, as the President of the Twelve, was the lawful successor, and we raised our hands to sustain him.

Again we were ordered to prepare to vacate our City and leave our homes for the mobbers to plunder. At a Conference, in Oct. 1845, Elder Parley P. Pratt spoke to us. The Lord has another purpose to bring about and fulfill. We know that the great work of God, must all the while, be on the increase and grow greater. The people must enlarge in numbers and extend their borders. They cannot always live in one city, nor in one country. They cannot always wear the yoke; Israel must be the head and not the tail. The Lord designs to lead us to a wider field of action, where there will be more room for the Saints to grow and increase, and where there will be no one to say “we crowd them”. . . And where we can enjoy the pure principles of liberty and equal rights. One small nursery may produce many thousands of fruit trees while they are small, but as they expand toward maturity, they must needs be transplanted, in order to have room to grow and produce the natural fruit. It is so with us. We want a country where we have room to expand and grow; in short, this people are fast approaching that point which ancient prophets have long since pointed out as the destiny of the Saints of the Last Days.” In January, 1846, it was announced the exploration of California and regions west of the Rockies showed a good valley in the mountains, and that we were to depart in the spring, so water and grass would be available for teams. By February 6, the mobbers struck, and the first wagons, loaded with only the necessary things for life, started crossing the Mississippi River, bound for the unknown. I helped to move my family to Garden Grove and then returned many times to bring those Saints who had no teams or wagons and were destitute from the robbings of the mobs.
1890 John Ellis and Harriet Hales Ellis Family

Harriet and I went on to Fort Madison, Illinois, where our first son was born, Stephen Hales Ellis on 18 October, 1846. It had just been two weeks before Harriet’s father Stephen had gone out to look for oxen that had strayed and he drank some poisoned water and died. I had loved that man as a father, and mourned his passing.
We moved across the river to Appanoose, Hancock County, Illinois, where our second son John Henry was born, on 19 March, 1849. Shortly after that event, we went to Garden Grove to live until the following spring. Homes had been built there and gardens planted for those families who were unable to go to the Salt Lake Valley in one season. We started for that place in 1850.

1850 first home John Ellis built in Utah, Woods Cross

At the end of the long and arduous Journey we finally arrived at our destination. At last we would be able to choose where we were to live and not fear that we would again be driven from our homes. We could enjoy family life and the association of our fellow Saints in worshiping and living the Gospel, as it had been given us. Daniel Woods had made a settlement in 1849, just north of Salt Lake and just south of Sessions’ Settlement. We decided to settle there. I had land to clear and farm, and good neighbors who needed my trade as cooper. I made barrels, churns, buckets and wash tubs. The large one I made for Perrigrine Sessions became a “traveling tub”; neighbors from miles around borrowed it for their laundry and baths. Many stories were told of this tub. I built a small home for our family and there acquired two sites for molasses mills. I purchased from Heber C. Kimball his grist mill on Millcreek and ran it for many years. The molasses mills were the first in the community and my sons, as soon as they were old enough, helped with their operations. I also raised cattle and sheep.

1860 2nd home built by John and Harriet Ellis, Bountiful

As I look back over my life, I have many memories. Some of the sad ones were of being forced to leave the home of my parents and family yin Scarboro, Ontario, Canada. I never obtained forgiveness for listening to the Missionaries and being baptized. My testimony of its truthfulness was never listened to nor understood by them, but I am ever thankful for being led to the Hales family, who gave me the love and family life I needed. I was sad to see them both succumb to the ravages and harassments of the mobs, and to be buried on the plains, en route to the “Promised Land” they’d looked forward to. I am thankful for my lovely wife, who has always been at my side, through all our hardships and persecutions. She bore twelve children, ten of whom we reared and saw married to fine mates.

I am thankful for those many trials and tribulations that we had to endure, as they served to strengthen my testimony and bring me closer to the Lord and Master. I am most grateful for having known and been a personal, close friend to the Prophet Joseph, and to his brother Hyrum, who blessed and ordained me an Elder, at the time of trouble in Nauvoo. I was ordained a Seventy and hold that office today. After our arrival in the Valley I was called to again be in the Militia (which was organized from the old Nauvoo Legion) in Salt Lake City. We were called to check Johnson’s army in 1857. Because of false reports from conspirators in Salt Lake City to the U.S. Government, an army was sent to Utah, “to put down the rebellion.” The command was given to General Johnson, who was from the South, proud and haughty. He looked upon the Mormons as “rebels” and his troops, while on the march, boasted of what they would do when they arrived in Salt Lake City. They planned to pick out the houses they would inhabit, and farms and property, and women were to be distributed among them. “Beauty and body” were their watch words. President Young ordered out the Militia to maintain the pass, by force of arms, against any attempted invasion. He sent a letter to the army, then camped at Green River, Wyoming, forbidding them to enter Utah Territory. We were instructed to annoy the troops, stampede their cattle, set fire to their trains, burn the countryside before them so there would be no feed, keep them from sleeping by night attacks, blockade the roads, but strictly avoiding the taking of life. These troops were forced to face the snow and sleet of the most severe winter weather. Colonel Kane, an old friend to the Mormons, interceded, and the new Governor Cummings sent word back to Washington of the true circumstances, and that there was no rebellion. The army was to enter the Valley, but refrain from stopping in the city. However, President Brigham Young took no chances, and ordered us to fill our homes with straw and place straw in our gardens and fields, so that everything could be burned if Johnson’s army did not keep their word to leave our houses and fields alone. We were ready to be driven from our homes again, but this time it was to be on our terms. We would leave the desert as barren as when we found it. We would not leave them our homes and crops another time! With the knowledge of our decision, Johnson proceeded on to the Fort, and our homes were saved. The United States appointed governors and judges, who gave us much opposition and trouble, but the Lord pulled us through it all, with our religious freedom intact.
I shall miss my loved ones, for they have all brought me much Joy. I journeyed to Salt Lake yesterday, by freight train, to see a doctor there. He examined me and then said I had cancer of the face, and there was not anything he could do to help me. So I know my days are numbered. My 57 years on earth will not be in vain, if I can leave my fervent testimony with my posterity. I know that we have the only true Church of Jesus Christ on the earth, and that it is led by a chosen Prophet of the Lord, and will continue to be so led, until He comes again in the flesh. I am ready now to meet my Lord and Savior, with love in my heart for Him. I leave my testimony upon you all in His name.

198005 Boutiful marker of John Ellis and Harriet, also two last babies buried here

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